Life of Mirth
by Instant Noodler
Summary: Inspired by a true story. "If I had it to do over again, I'd choose you again." Kodak moments don't last forever. Life as we know it is full of mirth but also pain. Nothing was certain but one thing was for sure: he was never going to abandon her.


Here's a new good angst romance for everyone. I'm sitting in a really comfy chair on the med building's study floor right now; inspirations are just flowing to me from all over the place... I love this place... I have unlimited access to MD prognosis resources! Yay!

* * *

"I love you," she held the phone closer to her lips and articulated each word clearly for him to hear. She leaned into the soft and plush pillows against her metal L'Art Nouveau styled bed frame and bit her lips coyly as she waited for his reply. She had a wide grin across her face and she simpered when she heard his voice on the other side.

"I love you more," he responded to her endearingly. "More than anything in the world. In just a few days, you'll really be mine."

She could tell by the tone of his voice that he was smiling from ear to ear too. His deep and mellifluous voice was so tantalizing and comforting to her. She just wanted to hear his voice. It didn't matter what he said to her; she just wanted to hear it. Although they had been together for the past four years, she seemed to have fallen deeper and deeper in love with him each day, if that was even possible to love someone that much.

She took a strand of her long brown locks and began twisting it around the index finger of her left hand. She stared at her hand while she unwound her damp hair and turned her attention to the large rock on her ring finger. It was a flawless 3.12-carat Peruzzi Cut diamond set on a tapered trellis platinum ring.

"I'm really going to hang up now or the girls will kill me for having dark circles tomorrow for my final fitting," she took a moment to soak in the blissful thoughts running in her mind at the moment. They were finally going to get married. "Three more days... Just three more."

"Well, I'm counting by the hour and not days," he teased his fiancé playfully as usual. "Just seventy-six more hours then you'll become Missus Rin Takahashi."

His shrewd remark caught her by surprise; she switched the phone into her left hand and bit down on the thumbnail of her right hand. Rin was still grinning; Rin... Takahashi definitely had a ring to it. _'Mrs. Takahashi...'_

"Well, Doctor Sesshomaru Takahashi, your missus really needs her beauty sleep now," Rin used her sweet voice mischievously to make her point. "Don't work too hard, alright? I'll be dreaming about you."

"You'd better not dream about me playing with unicorns or some other mythological creatures," he chuckled and decided to tease her back with something ridiculous, she was so silly and random sometimes and he played along with her. "You know the ER is never not busy. Sweet dreams, Rin."

"Bye, Sessy," she called him by his diminutive name lovingly. She didn't want to end the call but she knew his short-lived break was probably over. He had once again used it all up talking to her instead of taking a much needed power nap. That was one of the drawbacks of marrying an ER surgeon - he was always busy, working and on call by the hospital. "Seventy-five hours and a half more..."

With that, she pressed the red end call button on her touch screen phone and gingerly placed her phone on her white nightstand to her right. Rin stared at her coarse ceiling for a moment and surveyed her bedroom. She would miss all of this: her small walk-in closet, walnut hardwood floors that she installed by herself, the big white fluffy carpet in the center of the room, her vanity from since she was 8-years-old, all the baby pinks and blues accents in her room... In a few days, she'll be moving into the new apartment they bought together in Minato, Tokyo and begin their new life as newlyweds.

Rin turned to look at her Hello Kitty alarm clock. She suddenly twitched when she realized how late it was. "It's already a quarter past midnight? I'm definitely getting dark circles. Sango and Kagome won't be happy about this!"

She was talking to herself once again. Rin slipped out of Sesshomaru's oversized hoodie that he had left at her place. She ran her fingers through her long cascading locks. Her hair was almost completely dried. She snuggled under her soft blankets and pressed her head against the plush pillows. Rin snatched up the two tea bags and gingerly placed them over her eyes. She reached for the lamp on her nightstand several times before she got a hold on the switch to turn it off. Before she knew it, she drifted into a sweet dream, dreaming of no one other than Sesshomaru.

* * *

Sesshomaru Takahashi turned off his phone and placed it back onto the upper shelf of his locker. He glanced at his watch. 12:15 am. His break was over and he needed to get back to work. The ER was especially busy tonight for some strange reasons. He was completely exhausted; he was already thirty-two hours into his shift but still had several more to go.

_'Oh god... it's been thirty two hours since my head hit the sheets... Just a couple more hours now... Then I get to see her.'_

Sesshomaru grinned when he thought of Rin and what was to come in a few days. He was taking a few days off for his honeymoon to Hawaii with his soon-to-be wife. He had never taken a day off, not even a sick day ever since he started residency at the hospital years ago. Now that he had earned his stripes up the hierarchy, he was going to take as much time off as possible to spend them with Rin.

_'Just a few more days...'_

He didn't need a power nap. Just hearing her voice was rejuvenating enough for him. It was more than enough. Sesshomaru closed his eyes and leaned forward onto the lockers to feel the cool metal against his forehead. The image of her adorable face appeared in his mind.

From the moment he had laid his eyes on her, he knew that she was "The One." He had always known that one day he would make her his wife. They were soul mates, best friends, and companions. She was his everything. Rin Hokkaido was intelligent, brilliant, gorgeous, warm-hearted, gentle, good humored, and... oh he could go on forever with his list.

On the first night they had met at their mutual friends, Miroku and Sango's dinner party, there was chemistry between them immediately. Their sparks turned into flames; they talked about everything he could possible have thought of from 12th century Greek and Roman mythology to current warfares and popular culture trends.

They stayed up until the sunrise and never ran out of things to talk about. Heck, four years later they still hadn't covered everything. She intrigued him through and through. She was the most interesting woman he had ever met in his entire life and that was saying really something because he was a very well read and educated man.

Most of all, after their first long night of conversation, he went right into a forty-eight hour shift without any rest from the night before. Surprisingly, with just the thoughts of her in his mind alone, he braved through his shift and still had the energy left to ask her out for lunch right after.

There was something so special about Rin. He lusted for her, he still did. His knees would go weak whenever he caught sight of her single glance. Just with one look, he would give her the moon if she had only asked. He was a thirty-year-old emotionally stable professional but whenever she was around, he was just a hormonal raging, senseless teenage boy. He did the "darnest" things around her; his actions were ridiculous and he even surprised himself sometimes. No one could understand how crazy in love he was with Rin; no one knew why either. Even he didn't quite understand it himself.

He looked at the picture of her on his locker once last time before heading out. He had secretly taken this photo out of their photo album without her knowing. It was taken on her twenty-third birthday after their cake fight. Her face and hair were covered with vanilla icing; Rin looked ridiculously cute. He smiled once again at her cute expression; it made him crack up every time.

_'Oh... my little precious Rin.'_

"Doctor Takahashi to surgery room 5, please. Doctor Takahashi to surgery room 5."

He let out a soft groan; unfortunately for him, surgery room 5 was the severe trauma room... This was going to be a hard and long night with lots of screaming and yelling and blood. Awesome.

_'Back to work...'_

* * *

Rin Hokkaido woke up in a daze; she had hit the snooze button more than four times this morning. She rubbed her eyes and felt her head pounding. She should have slept earlier last night; now she felt as if she had a hangover. She was physically drained and dizzy. She stretched her arms out to reach for her alarm clock. She couldn't measure the distance of her arm to the alarm clock correctly and missed on her first try. She was still so sleep deprived. Rin extended out her arm to reach for the alarm clock again but she missed it, again.

Strange. She was apparently having depth perception problems.

Sleep; sleep would be her best remedy right now but she didn't have time for that. Rin tried once more, this time she held her hands further out. She sighed of relief when she felt the clock in her hands and stared at the hour and minute hands. Wait. She caught her breath. Rin brought her hands up to rub her cloudy eyes once again. She was late. An hour late. _Late. Late. Late._

"Damn! Kagome and Sango are going to be so mad at me! Ahhhhhhh! Rin! What's wrong with you! What's wrong with me?"

Rin was suddenly startled by her tardiness. She was supposed to meet the girls at the boutique bright and early this morning for her final wedding dress fitting. She had been fussing about today for the past weeks. In fact, she was the one who had pushed the time forth to an earlier time slot a few days prior. Now she was a no-show. Darn. Darn. Darn. How many final wedding dress fittings did she expect to have? This was the single one in her life and she was already an hour late for it.

_'Dammit. Dammit. Dammit.'_

Rin shot up from her bed and her knees buckled, causing her to fall face first onto the ground. Ouch. Ouch. This just wasn't her day. The bed sheets tangled around her legs, pooling around her feet. She was usually clumsy; she fell over a lot but it seemed to be happening awfully a lot more lately. It must have been the stress of the wedding. She had been dreaming about her big day just like any other little girls. She had been planning this for the past year. It was no time to back out now.

_'No time for makeup, Rin.'_ She grabbed a slice of cold bread from the kitchen and threw on a trench coat. She had to go. _Go. Go. Go._ Rin ran towards her elevator and pressed the button repetitively. She glanced at her wristwatch one more time.

_'Why the hell is the elevator so slow? It's not even rush hour anymore.'_

Rin grew increasingly impatient. She fisted her hands and pounded at the miserable button. 'Come on... come on... Ugh.' Rin was so frustrated. Curse the stupid elevator; she was going to use the stairs. She picked up her tote bag from the floor and dashed down the hall to her right for the emergency stairs.

_'Alright, it's only the 12th floor, Rin. You can do it!'_

Rin grabbed the railing of the stairs and began her descend down. She was careful not to trip over anything. She was vigilant and chary... Rin took the stairs step by step, pacing herself as she went but...

_Whack._

_'Waah... Ou... ouh... ouch...'_

She tripped over and bruised her kneecaps on the third floor. Thank goodness her wedding gown was floor length and she wasn't bruised anywhere else. She surveyed the bruising; it was a dark shade of pink and when she ran her fingers across her knee, it was tender. Her creamy skin was torn. The wound was stinging; Rin cringed as she tried to straighten out her stance. There was no time to cry over a boo-boo. She was late for her wedding dress fitting for heaven's sake.

If she thought waking up and running down the stairs of the 12th floor was the worst thing she thought she was going to happen that day, she was more than wrong. The morning traffic was terrible. It was just pitiful. It seemed like it was just little Rin Hokkaido against the world today. Nothing was going her way. She missed two stops on the subway and couldn't squeeze out of the train to get off in time for the third stop.

Rin glanced at her wristwatch again; she was almost three hours late. The boutique seemed further away today. Darn.

"Rin-chan! You're l-a-t-e!" Kagome and Sango tapped their fingers against the table of the reception waiting room. They were less than pleased. "How can you be so irresponsible?"

"Sorry! Don't eat me! I'm sorry!" Rin was almost in tears, she was panting and dying to catch her breath. "I had a rough morning! I swear! I've received my punishment already!"

"That's not the point! We called you so many times this morning! We were so worried about you!" Kagome shook Rin by the shoulders and gave her a stern stare. "How would we answer to Sesshomaru if something happened to you!"

Rin reached into the pocket of her trench coat. _No phone. Drat._

_'I must have forgotten it this morning in frenzy. Drat. Drat.'_

Her whole life was scheduled in that little touch screen device. Without it, she had no idea what she was doing today. She did know she had an appointment with the caterer... at some time... Dammit.

"Miss Hokkaido? We're ready for you," the seamstress, Hitomiko, called from the back. "Come in, honey."

"Let's go, Rin-chan," Sango prompted Rin and grabbed her arm to lead her to the back. Sango gave her a hearty smile. She wasn't mad at Rin anymore; the frown from her forehead had long disappeared. She was just relieved and glad that Rin was well.

"Alrighty," Rin began walking with Kagome and Sango. "Ah..."

"What's wrong?" Kagome turned around to face a fallen Rin. "Oh, Rin-chan... You're just falling all over the place lately. What's wrong?"

"I'm sleep deprived and my knees seem to be acting funny lately," Rin scratched the back of her head apologetically and out of embarrassment. She tried to tug down the seam of her capris to cover the bruise on her kneecap but Kagome saw it before she could cover it up.

"When did this happen, Rin?" Kagome crouched down to inspect the damage on Rin's knee.

"I fell down the stairs this morning. I told you girls that it's been rough," Rin let out a long sigh and bit down on her lips. She didn't now what else to say.

"Well, thank goodness we're not going to see that with the floor length gown. Just be careful, alright? We don't want our gorgeous bride with a black eye or something while walking down the isle," Kagome placed one hand on Rin's shoulder and nodded while giving her the forewarning.

"Miss Hokkaido?" the seamstress called her once more from all the way down in the hall. "Keep up, please."

"Sorry," Rin propped herself up from the floor with Kagome's help. It seemed like all she had done this morning was to apologize for all of her wrongdoings and tardiness.

"Well, if you would just like to step in here," the elderly lady gestured for the three women to enter the decorative private room.

Rin held her breath as she saw her gown on the body form. It was... perfect.

"Here, lets get you in here," the seamstress smiled at the very astonished Rin.

* * *

This was all she had ever wanted. She looked like a princess. The ivory white ball gown's folded satin lace bodice hugged her lyrical curves and the silk asymmetric cascading chapel train draped majestically down from her tiny waist. The re-embroidered lace vine motifs adorned the sweetheart neckline. _Perfect._

"Let's put the finishing touches on, shall we?" the elderly seamstress, Hitomiko, stood on the ped-stool and tiptoed to carefully place the long translucent white veil on Rin.

Was it hard to breathe or what? Rin held her breath; she couldn't believe her eyes... she was exquisite. The veil over her face had made it even more real than before. She was going to marry him in this gown. She felt overwhelming tears emerging from the rims of her eyes; her eyelashes were wet. A mixture of emotions ruptured from her.

"It's... all too good to be true," she whispered while bringing her hands to her face to cover her mouth. She was lost for words. She had fallen in love with the gown the first time she had seen it and now that it had been tailored to her figure it was even a better fit.

Kagome hugged Sango excitedly; the two bridesmaids were shedding tears along with the bride-to-be. Rin was so enthralled by the gown that she didn't notice her fiancé quietly entering the room. Kagome and Sango turned around to see a smartly dressed but extremely weary Sesshomaru strolling into the room. The two women were going to greet him until he brought his finger to his mouth.

"Shhhh," Sesshomaru smiled at the two young ladies and the seamstress.

The three women giggled softly at the sly young man and looked at each other understandingly, "Come on, lets give them a moment."

Rin was still running her hands down the tulle looking down at her chapel gown train, completely oblivious to her environment. Out of the blues, she felt a strong pair of arms around her waist. She felt the man's warm breath by her ears and suddenly it triggered a buttery feeling in her stomach. She had realized that it was his familiar sandalwood scent mixed with the hospital's disinfectants. He leaned forward to press his hard abs against her bare back and ran his fingers through her curls.

Rin was ecstatic to see Sesshomaru. She missed his touch although they had only been apart for 49 hours. That was too long. Too long. She was glowing in bliss until she realized something.

"Ahhh!" she turned around to cover his eyes with her tiny hands while cringing in exacerbation. "You can't see my wedding gown! It's bad luck for the groom to see it before the wedding!"

He took her hands into his and leaned down to kiss her neck, "I never knew you were so old fashioned, love."

She winnowed her fingers out of their interlace and cupped his cheeks, "I want to do everything right the first time."

Oh gosh he was so handsome, she gulped hard. She could get lost in his golden eyes for forever. He was breathtakingly handsome. He rivaled with Bernini's marble sculptures. Her Sesshomaru was just one of a kind. His muscular jawline gave him a stoical quality but his gentle golden eyes and brow reflected his good-natured and compassionate character. She surveyed him more carefully; he had dark bags under his eyes and he looked more frail than usual. Rin cringed.

"Why aren't you in bed? You probably haven't slept in three days," Rin's heart ached at Sesshomaru's fragility. All this sleep deprivation couldn't be good for his health. She just couldn't stand it when he was so delicate and vulnerable after his long shifts at the ER. She leaned closer to his chest and felt his irregular heartbeat under his soft light gray cardigan sweater vest.

"I called you so many times but you never picked up and you were a 'no-show' for the caterer's appointment," Sesshomaru explained. "I was so worried, how could I sleep?"

Rin blushed furiously and looked up to meet his gaze, "I woke up late this morning and forgot my phone. What have I done? I'm in such a mess... I'm sorry!"

"Stop apologizing, I'm not even mad at you. I went to the caterer's this morning myself and finalized the guest list and the six course meal," Sesshomaru pause for a moment while looking lovingly into Rin's eyes. "And I have a surprise for you."

"What surprise?" Rin waited impatiently for him to reveal the surprise; he just loved doing that to her - perking up her anticipation.

"I've got the final sample of our wedding cake," he whispered into her ears.

"You have the red-velvet cake?" Rin's eyes sparkled and her voice was higher than usual. What a perfect surprise; she was still starving. Could she love Sesshomaru any more than she did? _Yes._

She grabbed the nape of his neck and gave him a forceful and vigorous kiss. He pulled her in closer to him to deepen the osculation and worked his hands down to the small of her back.

"Rin sweetie?" they broke the kiss for a moment to catch their breaths and Sesshomaru suddenly had a request for Rin.

"Yes, Doctor Takahashi?" Rin batted her eyes playfully at her fiancé.

"Can we get Hitomiko-san to replace the lace bodice binding on the back with zippers or something more... convenient?" Sesshomaru smirked at Rin's priceless expression. "Unless you're willing to accept the fact that your eager husband will just tear it apart after the reception."

Rin couldn't hold her laughter in; she gave him a playful gentle punch on the shoulder, "You'll be fine, your wife here will be more than glad to help you out."

With that, she grabbed his hair to bring his face down to hers once more to continue the passionate kiss.

* * *

"Rin! Tonight at six! Remember, do not be late!" Sango reminded Rin sternly as they walked to the reception area of the boutique. "Or Kagome and I will hunt you down this time!"

"I swear, Rin, if we don't see you at six o'clock sharp we'll knock your door down and file a missing person's report on you!" Kagome added to Sango's remark jokingly. "It's your last night as an unwed woman and we're going out to celebrate!"

"Okay, okay," Rin clenched to the satin straps of her oversized bag containing the box with her wedding gown. She stuck her tongue out at the girls and rolled her eyes at their hyperboles. She was usually responsible and punctual but she didn't know what had gotten to her lately. It was probably the stress of the crunch for her wedding. Everything had to be finalized and meticulously executed. She just wanted to have everything done right because she knew for sure that she was only going to get married once.

"I'll have her there on time, don't worry, ladies," Sesshomaru laughed as he tightened his grip around Rin's shoulder. "It's on me, I'll make sure of it."

"No you won't, Sesshomaru," Sango gave him a quick punch on his arm. "Miroku, InuYasha, Koga, and Bankotsu are taking you out tonight. You stay out of us girls' way."

"Alright, alright, I get it," Sesshomaru stepped back a few steps, he knew better than to mess with Sango. That woman meant business; she was a retired three-time world's karate champion.

"Let's not kill Sesshomaru before the wedding, we might need him to be in the photos, Sango," Kagome reminded her friend while trying hard to suppress her laughter.

"But after the wedding, you can use him as a punching bag as much as you want," Rin teased while she tightened her hug around Sesshomaru's waist.

"Very funny ladies," Sesshomaru rolled his eyes and turned to Rin. "You know you don't have the heart to do so. You would never surrender me to Sango."

"Enough joking around, I have to go back to pick up Satsuki. Okaa-sama and Otou-sama have an engagement this afternoon," Kagome looked at her wristwatch for the time and was reminded that she needed to pick up her daughter from her in-laws.

"Six o'clock! Don't forget, Rin!"

"I won't!" Rin tiptoed to wave at her two girls.

"So, nap time for Doctor Takahashi?" Rin buried her face in his chest and inhaled his sweet scent and yawned.

"The missus needs a nap too I see," Sesshomaru brought his hand to stroke his fiancé's dark brown locks. "Let's go."

Rin wobbled as she began to walk with him and tripped herself on a crack. She thought she was going to scrap her other knee before Sesshomaru caught her in his arms.

"Rin, what are we going to do with you?" he chuckled at her clumsiness; she was clumsier than ever before.

"You're going to marry me, love me, and piggy back me," she snugged to him closer than before.

"Will do, will do, Mrs. Takahashi."

* * *

"Hmmm... hello there," she rubbed her eyes and ran her hand on his godly marble like abs. Rin brought her bare legs to straddle around his waist while her body was intertwined with the loose bed sheets. She just had a really good power nap in Sesshomaru's arms. Rin inhaled more deeply this time to take in more of his scent and reached to caress his cheeks.

"Hmm..." he sluggishly opened one eye to look at her but he was still slightly disoriented from his sleep depravation. Sesshomaru was just too tired. He attended to twenty-seven cases of emergencies during his shift and he had been running around to the caterer to make up for Rin's missed appointment right after he was done with work at the ER.

Rin squinted to look at the clock on the wall. 4:58 pm. She yawned again and stretched her legs to unwind her muscles. She felt energized and rejuvenated after the nap; she wished she could say the same for Sesshomaru but he looked half dead.

_'Poor Sessy,'_ Rin let out a weak and sympathetic smile on her face. She leaned down to kiss his cheeks once more and gingerly brushed his eyelid shut with her fingertips.

"I'm going to go back to my place to take a shower before I go out with the girls," Rin whispered to Sesshomaru.

Sesshomaru nodded in acknowledgement and made no other sound or movement in response. Rin shifted her weight to her other leg and began kicking the sheets away from her lower body. She leaned in once again to give him a soft peck on his lips before she rolled out of bed.

She stole another hoodie from his closet and looked at her own reflection in the mirror; she seemed to have lost a lot of weight lately due to the stress of the wedding. She hadn't even noticed; she was too busily calling the venues and finalizing the guest lists to look into the mirror. She should take care of herself a bit more. She had been eating instant noodles for breakfast, lunch, and dinner every day for this week. It couldn't possibly be good for her.

If she was planning to have a baby soon, she needed to eat a bit more to ensure she was healthy with the proper nutrition. Rin blushed; she and Sesshomaru had talked about having three children but... was it too early for her to become a mother? She had just turned twenty-five last month and her career as a professional art dealer and critic had just started. But still... she couldn't help it but to wonder if her baby would have Sesshomaru's eyes or hers. Rin had a bright and foolish grin on her face that she could just not wipe off from her face.

_'Tomorrow...'_

* * *

5:36 pm. Rin glanced at the clock on her microwave. She was nibbling on an apple. Rin thought long and hard for a moment - she still had enough time for a quick shower; she didn't want to feel yucky and clammy on her night out with the girls.

_'Shower it is then.'_

Rin took her hair out of the messy bun she rolled up and unzipped her hoodie. She unclipped the back of her garment and stepped into the shower. She reached for the stainless steel nob of her shower and let the hot water run for a moment before she stepped in to close the glass shower door behind her. The steamy warm water felt so great against her skin, washing away all of her anxieties and stress.

_'So warm... hm...'_

Then... the room started spinning... spinning...

_'I can't feel my knees... What's wrong with me?'_

Rin reached out to grab the railing in the shower...

Then...

Too late...

...

...

.

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

Too late...

...

...

Drip...

Clash...

Clank...

_'Sesshomaru...'_

_'Kagome...'_

_'Sango...'_

_'Someone...'_

_'Help me...'_

...

...

.

...

_'My...'_

...

...

...

...

.

..

...

...

...

* * *

"6:23! What the hell is going on with Rin?" Kagome hung up once again after reaching her voicemail. "Ayame, do you want to try calling her?"

"Sure, let me call her," Ayame cringed and leaned against the door down Rin's stairs.

_"Hello, this is Rin Hokkaido and I'm not here at the moment. Please leave a message and I will get back to you as soon as I can. Beep."_

"Nope, voicemail again," Ayame tapped her hand against the screen of her cellphone. "Do you think she's with Sesshomaru?"

"Nope, I tried. Sesshomaru said she went back to her place," Sango replied to satisfy Ayame's speculations. "Man, Sessy needs some sleep. He sounds like a zombie. I don't remember Miroku ever being that tired after his shift."

"That's because Miroku is a neurosurgeon and doesn't work at the ER, Sango-chan," Kagome rolled her eyes at Sango's remark. "He and InuYasha have it easy. They never have to take shifts longer than their longest operations."

"Or you can just be like Koga and go into prognosis consulting," Ayame winked at the girls. It was funny to hear how the women were complaining about their MD husbands. "But then again, Sesshomaru brings in the largest paychecks out of all of them..."

"Where is Mrs. Takahashi?" Sango complained again.

"I'm right here," Kagome knew Sango was referring to Rin but she decided to respond obliviously to Sango's rhetorical question.

"You know what I mean," Sango gave Kagome one of her signature 'speechless-lost-for-words because I know you're joshing with me' look. "Alright, time to bring down her doors!"

"Or you can just use a key," Kagome reached into her bag and held out a shiny golden key to Rin's apartment.

"Why the hell didn't you pull that thing out earlier, Kagome-chan?" Sango was irritated by Kagome's lack of prior contribution.

"I didn't know if I had it or not."

-x-x-x-

"Rin-chan! I hope you're in here or have a really good explanation about your sudden disappearance!"

"Rin?"

"Rin-chan? Oh where are you?"

"Rin!"

No Rin. No answer.

Kagome peeked into Rin's kitchen and found a half eaten apple on the counter. It wasn't shriveled or horribly yellowed. She hadn't been gone for too long.

"Do you hear it?" Ayame silenced the two women. "That sound?"

"Is she in the shower?" Sango suggested a possibility of Rin's whereabouts and listened quietly again. "Yup, she's definitely in the shower."

"Sango! Ayame! Come! Quick!" Kagome's voice was full of terror and urgency.

The two women ran into Rin's misty bathroom. Steam was everywhere... and Rin? Rin was lying on the cold tiles of her bathroom wrapped in a short towel; she was unconscious.

"I'll call the ambulance!" Ayame offered running out of the bathroom.

"I got Sesshomaru!" Sango took out her phone and tapped the "8" speed dial button immediately.

"Rin-chan! Rin!" Kagome had tears in her eyes. Why hadn't she gotten Rin's apartment keys out sooner? What was wrong with Rin? It was her wedding tomorrow. How could something like this happen? Kagome wanted to blame herself - if only she had gotten to Rin sooner. "Rin... please be alright."

* * *

His heart pounded against his chest; he was disoriented, confused, puzzled, irritated, worried, distraught, rattled, overwrought, concerned, antsy, apprehensive, anxious, flustered, and agitated at the same time. Sango's voice still ran in his head.

_'Sesshomaru, you need to meet us at the Memorial hospital. Rin's... at the ER.'_

What the hell was going on? She was just in his arms less than three hours prior. He was still sleeping when he got the call. He couldn't believe his ears when he first heard the news and thought he was dreaming about it. Then when Sango repeated it for the fifth time, he threw the phone aside and ran out of his apartment in a hazy daze.

_'No... what's wrong...'_

He couldn't think of anything. Was she hit by a car? He didn't have time to listen to Sango's explanations. Was her life in danger? Was she dying? Why was she at the ER? He knew his way around the place to well, he had spent 8/10 of his life at that place. The ER... He spent his time helping countless other patients but could he help her? Why the hell wasn't he there helping her? Why didn't he stop her when she wanted to go back to her place just hours before?

_'Damn, Sesshomaru... Dammit. Why didn't you stop her?'_

She was dead... if she were dead, he would let himself get hit by a car and die with her.

_'No... Stop it, she's fine. Rin's fine. She would never leave you.'_

He dashed around the corner and the nurse called out his name, "Takahashi-sensei! This way!"

He nodded at her. His throat was killing him; it was dry and cracking. Breathing hurt. He couldn't catch his breath. His head pounded and his vision was blurry. He didn't care. Only one thing was on his mind: Rin.

"I... Is... s... Is she... a... al... all...allr... all right?" Sesshomaru forced the sentence painfully out of his mouth.

"She's awake now and very much conscious. She just fainted while taking a shower. It could be the stress," the nurse reassured him that Rin was alive.

He had never been happier in his life; not even when she had said "yes" to his marriage proposal.

"Sesshomaru!" Sango, Kagome, and Ayame dashed towards the disoriented man.

"You never let me finish," Sango cringed at Sesshomaru.

"I was worried to death," Sesshomaru explained to the three women. "Can I go see her?"

"She's getting a CAT scan and MRI right now with Miroku. I called Miroku in to take a good look at Rin. She hit her head pretty hard," Sango explained to her concerned good friend. "I guess your bachelor party is off."

Sango pouted but she wasn't sorry. Miroku was the best in the field and only he could reassure them that Rin was going to be all right.

"I wasn't looking forward to it anyways," Sesshomaru dismissed Sango's concern and brought his sleeve up to wipe away the sweat dripping down from his forehead. From his experience, InuYasha, Koga, and Miroku's bachelor parties were all pathetically distasteful.

"Sesshomaru?" Miroku appeared down the hallway and held an envelope containing Rin's brain scan in his hand. "Can I have you here for a moment?"

Sesshomaru nodded and advanced towards his long-time friend and groomsman. He gulped hard; he knew Miroku well enough to tell that he looked troubled and rattled. Was it Rin's prognosis? It probably was.

"I need to show you something," Miroku gestured Sesshomaru to follow him into the dark room with the panel of bright screens on one side of the wall.

Sesshomaru wandered into the dark cold room and closed the door lightly behind him. The hair on the back of his neck all perked up; he didn't have a good feeling about this... At all.

"Have a seat," Miroku gestured for Sesshomaru to sit down on the physician's chair in front of the screen.

"I'll stand here," Sesshomaru leaned his leg against the long conference table in the room.

"No. Trust me on this one," Miroku's voice was low and full of hesitation. Sesshomaru knew something was very, very... very wrong. The suspense was devouring him from the inside. His throat was beating against his esophagus; his hands were ice cold and his throat was dry and burned when he tried to swallow. He rolled the chair next to him and took a seat while staring at Miroku.

Miroku took the two sheets of scan negatives and placed them against the screen. He looked at the ground for a moment to form his thoughts coherently. He didn't know how to break the news to him. Although this was his profession and he had done this to thousands of patients and their families, Rin was different and Sesshomaru was his close friend.

"Just give it to me straight, Miroku."

"You see this here?" Miroku directed Sesshomaru's attention to the opaque mass on Rin's cerebellum in the back lobe of her brain.

Sesshomaru's mind went blank for a moment; he was speechless. He was completely and utterly speechless. No. No. No.

No.

No. No.

No.

_No._

Not that.

Not like this.

_No._

...

...

...

...

No.

Not Rin.

...

He shook his head softly. Gradually, he rocked his head sideways harder and stared at Miroku with bewildered eyes.

"No!" Sesshomaru clenched his fist and pounded it against the oak conference table. "No."

"Sesshomaru, you can't be in denial," Miroku took a few steps forward to face Sesshomaru. "It is."

"You're wrong," Sesshomaru's voice cracked. "Those are not her scans! Give her another test!"

"It's spinocerebellar ataxia. I've confirmed it with a DNA test too," Miroku's voice was shaky and filled with grief. "I've given her two tests already. There's a 99.87% accuracy rate per test."

"Wh..." Sesshomaru was becoming mute. He felt an overwhelming sensation urging from his body. He suddenly felt weak. "Whi... which type does she have?"

"SCA25," Miroku placed his hands on Sesshomaru's shoulder. "I'm sorry."

-x-x-x-

Sesshomaru sat there in silence and listened to the ticking of the clock. With each sound, her life was slipping away from him.

"Spinocerebellar ataxia..." he whispered to himself. Why was it spinocerebellar ataxia? It was a genetic disorder. Rin's fate was sealed from the moment of her conception in her mother's womb. It couldn't be helped or prevented.

"Soon... she'll develop extreme incoordination of eye movement, speech, hands, limbs," Miroku began briefing Sesshomaru about the Rin's disorder. "When the cerebellum begins to atrophy and the ataxias set in, she'll lose complete physical control but..."

"But she'll retain full mental capacity and a sound mind," Sesshomaru finished the sentence for Miroku. "Her body will be useless but she would still have the brain capacity to process information and feel the pain."

"With her SCA25, additional symptoms include vomiting and extreme gastrointestinal pain..." Miroku shouldn't have added that last excerpt. As soon as the word "pain" left his mouth, he began to regret it.

"How long do you predict that she'll have?" Sesshomaru forced himself to ask Miroku that question. Did it matter? How would that change anything at all?

"It's rare, very rare; clinical researches have been very limited in SCA25," Miroku couldn't bring himself to look at Sesshomaru. "The average onset could be from one year to forty years. She could die in half a year or... live a normal lifespan. We cannot be certain."

Sesshomaru had a pitiful look on his face. Rin could either live a long and fulfilling life with him if her cerebellum didn't continue to atrophy or... die by the end of the year before New Year's. Her odds of survival ranged from 1 to 10, 1 to 100,000,000, or even 1 to 1,000,000,000,000,000. The zeros just kept adding up.

"Don't tell her," Sesshomaru broke the long and eerie silence. "Miroku, don't tell anyone about this. She's not ready yet, I'll tell her when... she's ready."

He was going against his professional conduct but it was her wedding tomorrow and it could be the last happy memory of her short life so he agreed, "I promise."

"Thank you."

* * *

Waaahhh... I feel like an impostor over here; I'm not even a part of their medical faculty. Hm... Meh. Did I mention there's great food here too? I've been impressing everyone around me by sitting here attentively for the past six hours typing away studiously on my laptop.

Well, another story? I just couldn't help it... It was just too tempting... Another angst-romance story for Rin and Sesshomaru. I still can't decide how I want to do with this. More angst more hope? Less hope and more angst? Happy ending? Sad ending? I'm happy to take this any way. Tell me what you guys think :)

PMs and friendly reviews are always welcomed.


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